The Heal Shame IQ Matrix explores how to better manage and work through feelings of shame. There are many authentic and helpful emotions that we experience throughout our lives. Shame, however, isn’t one of these emotions. Feeling ashamed does us no good. Guilt and regret, for instance, provide us with valuable feedback and takeaways that we can use to improve our lives.
Shame, on the other hand, is used as a masking tool. It actively masks authentic emotions and hides them behind a veil. Shame is, therefore, only a surface emotion, that serves no real purpose. One of the biggest drawbacks of feeling ashamed is that shame fails to separate the behavior from the individual. You, therefore, become your behavior, which leads you down a dark emotional spiral. There is, however, hope. This mind map will show you how to effectively work through shame and get on top of this difficult and at times toxic emotion.
Here is a quick breakdown of each branch of the Heal Shame IQ Matrix:
- RECOGNIZE: Shame is very easy to recognize when you understand what to look for. The first branch of this mind map explores how to recognize moments of shame. Moreover, it breaks down how shame manifests in our lives and masks our authentic feelings.
- EVALUATE: Having recognized shame, it’s time now to put our objective hat on and figure out why we are feeling ashamed. The second branch of this map presents you with a series of questions that help you to evaluate the situation along with your beliefs and thoughts about the situation. These questions will progressively start shifting your perspective while opening your mind to new possibilities.
- EXPLORE: As we reach the third branch of this mind map, we begin to explore your story, your authentic feelings, standards, and expectations coming into this situation. Again, here, you are presented with numerous questions that challenge you to think about your shame in an objective and thought-provoking way.
- CHOOSE: The final branch of this mind map highlights that you have a choice. In other words, it’s time to choose your path. You can either succumb to your shame, or you can choose a different path that will allow you to willingly embrace your uniqueness and flaws irrespective of your circumstances.
This map provides a roadmap for healing shame. Referencing it regularly and committing it to memory will help you to embed these principles into your subconscious mind. Only in this way will you develop optimal habits of mind and patterns of behavior that will transform how you think and feel in various situations.
A mind map, of course, does this beautifully because it mirrors the synaptic connections made in your brain as you try to establish new habits of thought and behavior. It brings together key concepts and ideas that help your brain to fully integrate and process this information. The brain, subsequently, rewires itself as it attempts to establish new habits of mind. It’s an ideal tool for creating lasting change and transformation.